Predictions

Just some quick football predictions for this weekend:

East Fairmont @ North Marion

East looks to end another streak...they've never won at North Marion. East Fairmont takes a quick lead into halftime, 28-0. Should be easy from this point. But the North Marion band so rouses the crowd with their rendition of "God Bless the U.S.A." that North Marion comes storming back. With :46 to go, North Marion scores a touchdown to make it 28-27. As they go for the extra point, a midget runs onto the field and distracts the center. He snaps the ball but is so enthralled with the midget that he doesn't block and EF blocks the PAT. East wins...28-27.

University @ West Fairmont

West pulls out to an early 14-0 lead after Justin Hostetler throws two early interceptions. Jeff Hostetler is so mad at this that he pulls him from the game and puts himself in the game. Jeff, after throwing 3 more interceptions, finally gets on the right track and completes some passes. University pulls ahead in the 4th quarter and wins 35-25. The game is currently under appeal...

Morgantown @ Preston

The Knights refuse to take the field and, instead, make buckwheat cakes for the Morgantown players. The Mohigans win by forfeit.

Bridgeport @ RCB

Bridgeport takes a narrow 7-6 lead into the 4th quarter. RCB throws an interception with 3:00 left and it looks to be over. Then, from the shadows, Robert C. Byrd himself, gowned completely in white, steps forward and rallies the troops by reading about the great Caesar. So inspired, the RCB players force a turnover and score the winning touchdown with :02 remaining. RCB 13 - Bridgeport 7.

Virginia Tech @ WVU

#3 Virginia Tech comes blowing into town hoping to avenge the loss 2 years ago. The game starts out bad for the Hokies as Marcus Vick arrives late to the game after spending some time with some teen girls that Mark May from ESPN had sent him. The Mountaineers chase the hungover Vick all over the field and he proves to be ineffective as the Mountaineers take a 14-0 lead. Things brighten for the Hokies when a kickoff is returned for a touchdown...but, wait just a minute my friend...replay clearly shows that the player's knee was down at the 50 and the touchdown is called back. WVU leads 14-0 at halftime.

Second half sees more of the same. WVU continues its domination up front and puts two more touchdowns on the board. Frank Beams is so distraught that he pulls Vick from the game and places his goiter in at quarterback. The goiter immediately finds an open man in the end zone to make the score 28-7 but it's too late for any comeback. WVU 28 - Va. Tech 7.Michael Vick is so upset that he checks himself into a nearby hospital under the alias Ron Mexico. Marcus Vick heads back to the hotel where a bus of middle school girls are waiting by. Frank Beamer and his goiter argue over the decision to wait so long to pull Vick. Their relationship is over and the goiter leaves to assist Charlie Weiss at Notre Dame. Beamer remains two more seasons at Va. Tech but, without the goiter, he is unable to lead his team down a winning path. Rich Rodriguez finally makes a BCS bowl and stays at West Virginia until the New England Patriots job opens up. Who wouldn't leave WVU for the Patriots? I continue writing because I can't think of a way to wrap this up. Oh yeah, Sunnyside is currently rebuilding. "